Monday, July 28, 2014

Diana - Email - July 28

So to start off this email i just want to tell you what i had for breakfast and I know that it is going to worry mom and make you all think i am gross but its what i was in the mood for and i have no money lol so this morning i woke up and i looked in my food and i have cereal but i have no milk so that would not do but i did see popcorn and honey. so this popcorn had EXTRA butter on it and i thought that would not be good for breakfast so i popped the corn and put honey on it to make it more like a breakfast it was really good and now i am not hungry lol it was yummy!! 
  Well on to my week it was really good nothing to exciting happened we saw some people and laughed but on Saturday we decided to walk all day to save on miles and so we did. We walked from 200th to 137th and back. we walked a little more than 13.5 miles. and i know to Jesse its nothing but i have had a car my whole mission and we only walk when we really want to.(which is NEVER) who want to walk when you have a car? anywho we walked all day and when we got home for the night i took a bath and then we went to bed. but even though i was tried and i wanted to give up so many times i just kept going and we talked to a lot of really nice people. 
 That was are big adventure this week. I have an amazing companion!!! 
So my little spiritual thought this week.So my whole life i have hated myself I am always making fat jokes about myself I tell myself that i am dumb that i talk to much that i am ugly. All of these really nasty things that i would never in a thousand years want to say to others. It has been really bad on my mission and its so bad that all 7 of my companions have had to set aside time to tell me that i need to love myself. every time I have this conversation with anyone I just don't think there is anything good about me. But if we go to the scriptures. Christ was asked the Question "what is the greatest commandment?" and he answered " Love thy God with all thy heart all thy mind and all they strength." " and the Second is like unto it love thy neighbor as THY SELF." so how can you fully love others when you don't love yourself? the answer is you cant! you can not love others fully until you can love yourself. 
 Sister prows is helping me change and it is not going to happen over night but something i have to always remember I WILL NOT BE PERFECT IN THIS LIFE!!! I wont. it is impossible there are to many things i do wrong everyday, but I have to try everyday to be better then yesterday and try better tomorrow then today. I will mess up I will fail but God my Heavenly Father made me all of me every little thing about me he put there for a reason. and how ungratefully of me when i pray and ask him to change something he thinks is perfect just the way i am. 
 so I am changing and I will like myself in a healthy way. and these are the things i have to remember everyday " There will ALWAYS be someone better then me, and there will ALWAYS be someone worse then me" God does not expect perfection of me today then why should I expect perfection of myself. And i don't need others to come up with excuses for me  i do good on my own. 
but anyway God loves me and I know yall love me because you wouldn't put up with me if you didn't lol but just like President Uchdorf  said the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago the next best time is today. so start today to be what you wanted to be yesterday. I love you all so much and i am so grateful for all of you in my life!! I know that the Book of Mormon is true i know God lives and I know That families are together forever!!! be happy!!!  

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